I am done with boys and their testosterone-y decisions. getting in fights and banging people and thinking with their ego all the freaking time. shut up. im done with the entire male gender starting now. All my friends will be girls from now on. UGHHHHH.

i don't need to pretend to be happy if i don't want to.

aaron needs to quit taking my pencils before i kill him

Is great and whatever. I don't have a partner in Bio anymore, which is lame, so I've just been skipping that class.

I hung out with this guy Aaron from my english class. He's a pretty cool dude. Really mellow, no drama kind of guy, veyr relaxing. Best friend kind of material, you know?

I forgot my sunglasses on the metro this morning, though. SUCK. whatever.

Im going to the DMV this weekend to get my permit. wish me luuuuck\\

THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!

So passover starts tomorrow.

but there is also a show tomorrow...


so i'm not going to the show. they will have to find someone else to do the makeup. OH WELL ITS MAH RELIGION

in other news, emily is corrupting a young innocent freshman and it's rather disgusting. STAY AWAY FROM THE PYSCHO CHEERLEADER. SHE GETS DRUNK SOMETIMES YOU KNOW.


speaking of which, my parents are out of tequila, damn them.

Heh.

Saturday

3 o' clock

The Panera in Friendship.

Be there.

under duress.

so. 

midterms- i hate them. i bought some notes from theodork. he charged me extra becuase i pick on him, but gave his 'nemesis' asher the notes for free. WTF.

boredom- i feel it. it's annoying. i will not study. i will not.

asher- something happened to him over spring break and he won't TELL me. obviously i blame gerard.

there is a musical. ashe ris in it. so is emily. i am doing costumes.


I have decided to start smoking.

 No. 

OH FINE AND YES TODAY IS XMAS BUT I AM JEWISH SO I DONT ACTUALLY CARE. I WENT WITH RAVEN TO HER WITCH THING AND MET A GUY AND WE DID THE DEED. I DID NOT EAT ANY CHINESE FOOD. WE ATE POPTARTS. ALSO I KEYED SOME GUYS PORCHE

Is it Christmas? 

Asher got in a car accident but he is okay and now maybe might go to drivers ed. Maybe might.

Previosuly he tripped Theo's friend Orlando or soemthnig and made fun of him for being a dumb nerd. Theo swelled with righteous anger and attempted to blast him to smithereens with his fury. As you can probably guess, the ensuing bitch fight was the stuff of legends. So they aren't friends anymore. Coolio, this means I can go make to making him cry by sprinkling pencil shavings onto his notebooks. ocd is fun to play with when the recipiant happens to be a a total brat with a stick so far up his but that it might actually be his spinal cord.

raven and i planning to do somethnig illegal and wonderful on christmas if at all possible, since neither of us celebrate. Ideas? We toyed with streaking in front of the jefferson memorial but it is too damn cold for naked outdoor antics. 

Happy Hanukkah, bitches.

 I have returned.

I never want to see pasta again. I GET IT FAMILY WE ARE ITALIAN. WE CAN ALSO ORDER THAI OR CHINESE OR INDIAN (OMG CURRY FTW) ONCE IN A WHILE TOO YAKNOW. I WILL NOT SUDDENLY THINK THAT I'M ASIAN. 

We are italian jews. I CAN NEVER STOP EATING. STEREOTYPING SAYS SO. NOM NOM NOM.

i might explode.

 I am almost in New Jersey. Supposedly I have family here.I am sharing a room with my cousin Hannah. She is preppy and bitchy and I despise her.I think i will tamper with her birth control.

Today was asher's last day of footballing. i was there because i was. i watched this go down (paraphrased):

Asher: I hate everything, including food and winter and cornstarch and legumes and breasts and vaginas and the number seven and anythnig with fucknig granola, but i really hate my family and thanksgiving!

Jake Willis: Come to my family's thanksgiving, pal o' mine whom I adore in a straight kind of way seeing as i am veyr straight and manly and lust after your football skillz.

Mr. Willis: GOOD IDEA MY BOY MY BOY. I HAVE PAUNCH.

Asher: Um....Who are you? I have toenails and red bull and i llike sticking my penis in people's butts and diana is my goddess and my dfog is whiny and did you aks me a question?

Mr Willis: COME TO OUR THANKSGIVING MY BOY MY BOY

Theodork Willis: Dad! Ohmigawd you cannot be serious.

Mr. Willis: STFU THEODORE NOBODY CARES

Theodork Willis: WAAAH *sulks...nerdily*

Asher: HAHAHAHA Ok i will becaus ei like to irritate theodork in a wholly non-pulling-of-pigtails kind of way and this apparently annoys him and you don't have to worry about cooking becaus ei don't regularly eat but if there is alcohol i will drink it and will there be any attractive butts for my penis?

Mr. Willis: HAHAHAH SO MANLY.

Asher: Dude, I'm gay. Like, flamingly.

Mr. Willis: HAHAHA CHILDREN THESE DAYS, AMIRITE.

Theodork Willis: My life, she is over.

Jake: Be quiet, Theodore, I am admiring asher's manly pecs in a totally straight kind of way.

Mr. Willis: I AS WELL.

Theodork: ARGH! *kills self*

Nobody: *cares*

Asher: Plz to not be molesting me, you strange strange family.


i might have paraphrased once or twice.

 So, I'm back to using caps again. Wooo. I think I was giving Emily an anuerism and I need to keep her around. She has a new recipe for fudge.

Let me see. What has happened. The dramaqueens got chummy, which then caused a problem for the nerdsome twosome. Apparently Theodork has now decided that the way back into Jess's good graces is to be even more of a bitch to Asher. This is amusing except for the part where he should fuck off and die.

I have a stalker named Anthony. I have been unable to figure out how to get him to go away and stop him fom liking me. No matter how horrible I am to him, he keeps coming back. So now he carries all my stuff and is my personal slave. I will break him eventually. I will.

Now. A picture that Asher made on my computer. He tried to copy my style. Leave it to the professional stick figurers, kid.

my week:

last saturday: i woke up to find my mother sitting on my bed. then i had lunch with raven.

sunday: i found out that asher spent the night at theodorks house and had an enlightening conversation with emily.

monday: i cut up an old jacket of mine and made it a vest. then i stuck some buttons on it and am apparently artistic. hmm.

tuesday: during advisory i bullied theo into letting me touch his hair. it is actually very soft. i then found out a cheerleader named anthony is in love with me.

wednesday: emily got her period the night before and transformed into satan. she made lots of food, though, so it was all alright. i saw another cheerleader fleeing her in terror and enter a bathroom. i saw emily enter the bathroom in pursuit. i saw emily leave barely contianing her glee. entered the bathroom to find that the other girl was weeping all over. didn't want to be a part of it, so i turned out the lights and left. i passed asher and theo having one of their heartfelt chats, where asher tries to look intimidating and theo does his petrified frog impression. boys of many talents, they are. was a busy day.

thursday: cheerleader anthony would not leave me alone and so i locked him in a janatorial closet. i am that amazing, yes. also, apparently emily poisoned someone. skipped assembly to go hang out with some kids from my history class, but they all just got high and it was boring so i left them to be mellow. asher set off some fireowrks on theo's behest. sometimes i wonder.

friday: emily dragged me to a pet store to help her buy a rat. she named it franklin and says that they are kindred spirits. i do not doubt this.

today: my parents are trying to get me to carve pumpkins. that is all there is. 


in other words, sex. it happens. can we all shut up about it?

try not to get to excited, but asher and i have created blogpsots where you all can send in stories and such and we will respond to them. actually, he stole my idea, but these thnigs happen when you are perfect.

mine is: Super Bitch Online, where I capitalize and mock people's problems. Not constructively, no, not kindly, but in a rude, abrasive manner. I doubt nayone will send anythnig in, but there was a bet involved.

asher's is: Super Whore, where he talks about sexual escapades and will give advice, i suppose, on anything related to sex.

part of me feels like emily should make a Super Pep blog, and jessica a Super Ditz one, and theodork can make a Super Nerd one.

in other news, asher and benny broke up and now apparently asher is best friends with theodore. it's all very suspicious.

emily has her period, which means she is acting extra sugary sweet and baking a lot, all the while attempting to destroy everyone who looks at her funny. i pity jordan, i really do.

ps: crisi and her boytoy: moxilla. that is all i'm saying.